Why Punishing Your Cat Doesn’t Work—And What to Do Instead

Tired of the squirt bottle routine? Here’s a better way to change your cat’s behavior.

Hey Whisker Crew,

Let me just say it: I used to be that cat dad.

Back when I first adopted Mia and Nomar in 2003, I had no idea what I was doing. I’d never had cats before. So when they jumped on the counter or clawed the couch, I turned to Google. And what did Google say?

Spray bottle.
Coins in a can.
Aluminum foil.
Loud “NO!” and clapping.

So I did all of it. And like so many cat parents, I thought I was helping. But honestly? I was just confusing my cats—and slowly breaking their trust.

Fast forward to today—with Niko and Milo, I’ve been trying to do better. But even now, I catch myself slipping into old habits when they leap onto the counter while I’m prepping dinner.

That’s why this week’s conversation with certified cat behavior specialist Molly DeVoss hit home.

We talked about what really happens when you punish your cat—and why it often makes the problem worse.

Listen to a brief clip of my interview with Molly here…

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🎧 Main Takeaways from the Clip:

🐾 Punishment doesn’t teach—it confuses.
Cats don’t understand why you’re yelling, spraying, or clapping. It just makes you seem unpredictable and scary.

🐾 Most “bad” behavior is natural behavior.
Jumping. Scratching. Exploring. These aren’t crimes—they’re instincts. It’s up to us to guide our cats, not scold them.

🐾 Your energy matters.
Bringing stress, anger, or frustration into the home affects your cat more than you realize. The vibe we bring to their environment matters.

🐾 Behavior is communication.
Instead of asking “How do I stop this?” ask “Why is my cat doing this?” You’ll often uncover a need that isn’t being met—boredom, hunger, stress, curiosity, or a need for connection.

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✅ A Simple Shift: From Punishment to Redirection

Molly shared something that stuck with me:

“You can’t tell a cat no—you have to show it what you want it to do instead.”

That’s the shift I’m making with Niko and Milo. Instead of saying “no” when they hop on the counter, I’m giving them better options—and rewarding them when they take those.

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🔁 Step-by-Step Transition Plan

If you’ve used punishment tactics in the past (no shame—I’ve been there), here’s how to start fresh today:

1. Stop the spray bottle.
   And the clapping. And the yelling. It’s not working—and it’s harming your bond.

2. Observe the behavior.
   What’s your cat actually trying to do? Are they climbing for height? Following you for attention? Seeking food?

3. Provide a better alternative.
   If your cat jumps on the counter, place a cat tree or perch nearby at counter height. Let them watch you from a safe “yes” space.

4. Reward the behavior you do want.
   Give treats or affection when they use the new spot. Ignore the behavior you don’t want (don’t even look at them when they jump up).

5. Set up passive deterrents—not punishments.
   Try sonic mats or those clear plastic carpet runners (spikes up!) on off-limit surfaces—but only after offering a more appealing option nearby.

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🧡 What I’m trying this week:

• Moving a tall cat tree next to the kitchen counter for Niko and Milo (especially during dinner prep).

• Feeding them right before I cook, so they’re full and less likely to climb.

• Practicing total silence when they misbehave—and saving my attention for the moments I want to reinforce.

• Reminding myself daily: "Guide, don’t punish."

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🐾 This Week’s Cattitude Prompt:

What’s one behavior your cat does that drives you a little nuts—and what could you do to give them a better outlet for it?

Think in terms of “show them what to do instead,” not “stop that!”

Drop your answers in the comments or hit reply—I’d love to hear what you’re trying this week.

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🎧 Listen to the full episode:

Episode: “You’re Disciplining Your Cat All Wrong - Here’s What Actually Works With Molly DeVoss”
👉 Click here to listen or search Golden Whiskers wherever you get your podcasts.

Thanks for being here, for showing up for your cats, and for doing the work to make their lives—and yours—just a little better.

Until next time,

💛 Scott | Golden Whiskers 🐾